This week has been tough, very tough. My 16 yr. old son's friend came home from school on Wednesday and found her mother dead. Awful I think is and understatement. I originally had intended my post to be light hearted, humorous yet realistic to my everyday life. Well this one is as real as it gets. My heart breaks for this family. I also struggle with how to help my own son try to understand why things like this happen. I do believe praying has helped me find strength to support him as much as I can. I also believe some times you just don't have the answers to all the tough questions even though our kid's believe we do. My work as a nurse has made me face my own mortality many times but this, this has made me really think about how my children will deal with my death when Jesus calls me home. Am I living every day like it's my last or do I take for granted every day that I have left on this earth? I like to think I appreciate every day with my family but let's be real. I have arguments with my teen sons that leave me so infuriated that I don't even stop to think how I have made them feel. What if this were the last time that we ever spoke, would they know that I only want what is best for them. Do they know that I still look in and watch them while they sleep, amazed at what beautiful young men they have turned into. Do they know that I don't always choose the right words when I am angry? Do they know that I thank God every single day for the blessing of being their mother? This week has been tough but I thank God for opening my eyes, for making me search my heart and for making me want to strive to live each day like it is my last. Don't let the sun go down on your anger and remember to show those you love just how much they mean to you even in the midst of anger and opposition.
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